Skip to main content

Am a grown woman

Since I have been back home, women in my family particularly my mother are constantly on my case to dress better. Although they want only the best for me, it gets on my nerves.

Women ( and men) in my country dress differently than I do. SENEGAL is a country where being casual is misunderstood. People like to dress up, men and women. Even if they wear jeans, they will wear it in such a way it does not feel dressed down at all. Girls would add nice blouses and sometimes blazers and spruce things up with sandals and a matching tote bag. Men would wear loafers and a shirt with also a blazer. As for traditional wear, the fancier the better. They also like to follow trends and color coordinate. It is not unusual to see someone wearing one color from head to toe. They spend huge amount of money to be trendy because we live in a country where only people who dress up are respected. If you do not, people either do not acknowledge you (try shopping in a fancy place wearing tattered clothes, no one will pay you no mind) or they put you down.


Scarf - old HM
Jacket -super old Ross 
Denim shirt - random shop in India
Pants - Big Bazaar, India 
Shoes - TRF then diy 


 As for me, I always dressed differently. I always had my own style even if it made my mother cringe. From the moment I was born, she would dress me preferably in floral print dresses with ruffles or pastel suits. I liked them, the girlier the better. But when I started getting curves, I became so self conscious I started hiding my body in baggy jeans and my father's polo shirts. My mother was mortified. And she tried everything she could to make me stop.  I rediscovered my feminity when I discovered boys. The way they looked at me when I was wearing skirts and dresses made me guidy. So for all of my teenage years, I was a tomboy who liked to dress feminine from time to time (like for parties). Things started to get complicated when I went abroad to Japan. For the 1st time in my life I had the financial power to buy my own clothes. And I took advantage of it. Half of my clothes were casual with jeans and tops. The other half was over the top sexy things for clubbing. I still had a small percentage of decent clothes reserved for formal events. For the first time also my body was no longer an issue. I did not hide it as much as before. I was proud of it, and flaunted it. I loved my legs, my flat stomach and small chest. I was feeling myself. Only when I started gaining weight did I return to covering my body. And that stayed with me till today.


What I also discovered in Japan was the free style of the young crowd. Some Japanese can be fearless when it comes to fashion. They would try anything and everything. They were not afraid of colors as well. It is there that I learned that my bag did not need to match my shoes. But experimenting in Japan screw me up so good, my Fashion sense is not appreciated back home.



For one thing, when I chose clothes in the morning, I put into account three factors: where am I going? What is the weather like? And it is comfortable. Say, I am off running errands in the city, which means walking a lot and riding the bus. For that I will certainly wear a pair of jeans or fitted pants, a tunic and some flats. There is no way I will wear a dress and heels. And if it is cold, I am grabbing my denim jacket or a cardigan.  I will dress accordingly when I go out to visit friends, for dinner or even for a formal event. I would put out preferably in a dressy pants and top or a maxi dress and blazer. I will also wear make up  But that is about it. I like my style clean, simple, modest and comfortable. I rarely wear high heels (even if I loooovvvve them) and do not even get me started on daily make up. I have two hair styles that I change every 3 months.  I do not dress sexy at all. My bag will probably not match my shoes and I like color blocking instead of color coordinating.  I am not judging anyone who is flashy, and sexy and well put togeter . My best friend is flashy, and wears lots of make up. You can count on her to dress up even for running errands and I love that about her but that ain't me.




People here keep on telling me that eventually I will give in and start dressing like them particularly when I start working. I would not have any other choice. I will be forced to do so when I see everyone around me doing the same thing. I am not sure of that. I know my style, I know what I like and more importantly I know what I am comfortable wearing. I may be influenced but at the end of the day, I wear what I like whether it makes my mother cringe or not.


After all, I am grown woman !

Comments

G. said…
Love love love this post!!!

Indeed Senegal is a tough place as it relates to fashion and being out of the box. Stay true to yourself, that is what fashion is all about!

Popular posts from this blog

A la Camerounaise

Remember when I said that I was never going to change my style, because I like what I like (which is to be comfortable)?

Well I lied! My style is slowly changing. As my love life is in shambles at the moment ( I will get to that in a future post, I promise), I feel the need to go for a drastic change. I have contemplated the idea of cutting my hair (been there, done that!), dying it blond/ red or just forget this Hijabi thing all together. But as always, it is in the clothing department that I get to transform myself.

Truth be told, I am sure that even when things were perfectly normal at home, I would still go with a style change. The reason being that I am influenced at work. Women at my job are very simple and casual but they can turn the heat up from time to time. My favorite day is Friday when almost every one get to dress up in Traditional Attire. As someone who does not have many traditional attires, I am amazed at all the designs and styles out there. My eyes are feasting and …

When after work turns into a Fashion shoot

I went to my first "After work" the other day. For those who do not know what that is, "After work" is when colleagues get together for drinks or diner after work. Oups! I forgot to tell you! I started working for an international aid agency recently. I finally found myself a job that I also happen to like. Praise the Lord! I have been working for the last few months. It is challenging but I get to learn so many new things. And the best part are the people I get to work with particulalry the ladies. I enjoy them, every single one of them for they all have interesting personalities. They are also hilarious. I spend my days laughing. And I could not be more grateful to God for that!
Since two of my co workers were leaving (sad part of my job: people do not tend to work there for a long time), we decided to surprise them with an "After work"/ farewell party. We went to Marina Bay, which is a seaside hotel with a fabulous pool located in a hip area called …

Ramadan Lethargy

Hello dears.

How are you?

And for those fasting, how is your Ramadan so far?

We are in the last week of Ramadan and I am feeling great. I cannot complain.
However I could not help but notice a certain lethargy that has engulfed the town and the people living in it. since the beginning of Ramadan. For starters people go to work later than usual because they are still trying to catch some sleep between the time they eat and pray in the morning and the time they go to work. It is harder particularly for women who wake up early to cook something for their families. Even when you get organized and cook something the night before going to bed, you still have to get up earlier to heat it up. And most women I know are not content on cooking something simple, like ordinary breakfast. They want to make elaborate meals that would please their families. They feel the pressure more than anybody else, and they sleep also less.
This lack of sleep can have some serious consequences on the body and the m…