Unfollow

Hello everyone!

How is life treating you?

I have been thinking about unfollowing people on Instagram lately. I do follow over 500 accounts but  most of them do not bring me joy anymore. 

 

Glasses - Kiabi

Jacket - bought in Pune, India

Dress - from a seller in donwtown Dakar

Shoes - thrifted

Watch - Sea plaza mall

 

When I started using Instagram a few years ago, it was mainly to follow the fashion bloggers I read on the regular. And the more I used the app, the more I curated it to accounts I really liked. I was following mostly black fashion bloggers, curvy fashion bloggers, and Hijabi fashion bloggers. With time, I added some diy pages, sewing tutorial pages, gossip pages, funny pages, photographers,youtubers, fashion houses, local restaurants and hotels, and finally some celebrities. 

 

 In all the years using Instagram, things have drastically changed. Back when I started using it, words like "content creator" or "influencers" did not exist yet or at least I was not aware of them. I did not even know you could make a living out of posting photos. I thought it was only for sharing pictures. But now it is an entire business. I even started using the app to do business. 

 

I do use the app daily for business or pleasure. And it brings me great satisfaction but it also has been draining at times. I have this tendency to compare myself to others on the app mainly fashion influencers. I look at their pictures and I think that mine are nothing compared to them. I dissect them trying to figure out where I went wrong. I read their captions and read about their lives and think that I am not really living. I basically have FOMO. Then I feel down and it pisses me off. As someone who suffers from low self esteem, Instagram is like a drug, a bad habit. And to cope,  I have resolved to unfollow people or their account. However, there are more reasons that I will try and explain below.  

Like I mentioned earlier, most account I follow are about fashion. I follow an influencer for her sense of style. So when that said influencer starts doing something completely different, I have a hard time following. For example if they start to talk about religion on the regular, or working out, I am turned off. I followed you to see how you put outfit together not to see you lift weights at the gym. 

Another kind of account I stop following are Hijabis who stop wearing the Hijab. We live in a world where it is hard for Hijabi to stay covered up. There is so much pressure from the society around. I started to follow many Hijabi accounts  because they showed me that I could cover up and still be stylish, fierce. They gave me several style inspirations. Therefore when they remove it, I feel betrayed. I feel like they failed somewhere.On top of that, I daily have struggle about keeping myself modest and keeping my head covered. Therefore I do not need to see a former Hijabi living her best life without the hijab. It could be too tempting. Mind you, those women never said that they were the Hijab ambassadors; tbut most of them used instagram as a platform to educate people on the Hijab and to show a side that many have never seen before. Yet, at the end of the day, iIt is their lives, and they can do whatever they want. But I cannot help but judge them. In the back of my mind I wonder if they buckled under pressure or the advantages of an influencer's life without the Hijab were just too juicy to pass on. Either way they no longer serve me so there is no point in following them. 

 

I guess the same can be said for plus size influencers. The moment they start loosing the weight, I am put off. Now I have not really stopped following curvy influencers yet because none of the ones I follow became super skinny. But it is something I will consider doing if that is the case. Because in my mind you cannot have a body positivity speech, only to want to loose weight. My thinking is if you love your body so much and want us to accept you for it, why you want to change that. I used to hate my body and I was never that fat. But I looked up to those curvy influencers to accept myself. It came to a point where I actually became bigger. I am overweight but I love myself more than I did when I was 20 kg lighter. I give credits to those influencers who made me see that having love handles and big thighs are nothing to be ashamed of. Now, imagine how I would feel if they become skinny and say that being big is not it. 

 

I also do not find any joy following the white californian wannabe types mominfluencers. I actually follow only two of them and at the beginning it was because they had great diy or sewing tutorials. But with time, they progress to more lifestyle content, which I am sure there is a niche for that. As for me, I am having a hard time identifying with their lifestyle. I am not a blond, skinny californian girl who runs early in the morning and takes care of 4 kids in a huge mansion with neutral tones. I have nothing in common with them, and to be real I am a bit tired of them rocking the same skinny jeans with striped shirts and baseball caps as casual looks. I can do that on my own now. I need more to be inspired. 

The last people I amms unfollowing are influencers who are becoming too cocky. When I started following them they were great; their message was always about how they struggled to be better. I felt that they were genuine. But with more success, you can see them adopt this new persona. They do have a positive attitude and love themselves more which should be great in itself. But their messages are sometimes a bit too narcissistic for my liking. Or maybe I just liked them when they were insecure because I could see myself in them. I am not exactly sure, but they do not bring me joy anymore.

 

I also unfollow people who are too rude in their comments towards other people or myself, people who are disrespectful or problematic in general. Instagram is an app for visual pleasure accompanied with fun and happiness, so if you are not there to give that to me, why bother? 

Unfollowing people is not a tool I use to be petty or to make a point. I am not about that cancel culture. Most of the people I follow, have so many followers that they would not notice if I left. Also, it is not about their work. I know most of them work really hard to give us great content. But unfollowing them is entirely for me and my peace of mind. Out of sight, out of mind is my motto when it comes to them. And it is true that once I start unfollowing them they never come back in my mind unless I see them on my Pinterest page or an event reminded me of them. Then I google them to see what has become of them after such a long time just out of curiosity. But rarely do I go back to an account after unfollowing them.

Unfollowing is something I would recommend. I have been using Instagram for over five years now. So many things have changed in my life and in the lives of the people I follow. Some got married and have kids now, some others have grown into a business. It is always great to see people grow. It is inspiring. But sometimes, they no longer serve your purpose. You needed them for something -to bring magic in yout life- and if they no longer do that, why linger.

 

Clean that timeline I say. Believe me you will feel much better.

I am sure some people unfollowed me or are thinking about it for multitude of reasons. Do I care? Probably because I want to build an empire and social media is a great tool for it. But the thing is with me you can rest assure that my content will still be the same: fashion, fashion, more fashion and then me, my life and more of fme. And by me I mean everything that I like or find upsetting. And if you are turned off by that, that is your right. But if you just discovered me or have been reading me for the past decade, I thank you. Please do not unfollow me 😂